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Tuesday, November 12, 2013

New Beginnings.

It's been quite some time since I wrote on this blog, and even longer since I wrote a non-Bachelor post. Truthfully, it's been a long, long time since I wrote a post of which I was proud, that made me laugh and hope that others found it funny, too.

When I first started this blog in 2009, I really had no hopes or expectations for it.  I simply wanted a space on the Internet that belonged to me. It took me a while to find my niche in the blogging world, mostly because I didn't have a theme that surrounded my blog.

Well, unless "I am a major dumbass" can count as a theme.  Because let's face it: I am a dumbass who has some pretty dumbass things happen to her.

In 2010, I made a goal for me and my blog: I wanted to become Blogger's Blog of Note.  I figured if I could do that, I'd prove to myself and the world that my stories held up, that they were worth something.  I diligently wrote every single day.  I campaigned on Twitter to get Blogger to notice me.

And then one day in June, they did.  I became Blog of Note.  I remember I was sitting in my principal's office, waiting to interview a teacher who would take over my job once I got married and moved away that summer.  It was hot and I was bored, so I decided to check on Twitter, which is when I saw I had been chosen.

My world, or at least the one I had created online with my blog, changed that day.  It was cool to have so many new readers to my blog, and I loved receiving all of the "fan" e-mails.  I wanted to feel like my readers could count on me, so I quickly began following everyone who started to follow me.

Not long after becoming Blog of Note, I began receiving e-mails from readers who wanted my help.  They, too, wanted to be a Blog of Note.  I immediately featured them on my blog, regardless of whether or not I liked what they were saying on theirs.  In retrospect, this is kind of stupid, I know.  I was just so grateful that they asked for my help that I wanted to do whatever I could to help their blogging dreams come true.  Several of these bloggers became people I considered my friends, even though we'd never met face-to-face.  When they decided they didn't need me anymore, that I could no longer be of help, they stopped following my blog and stopped e-mailing.  That hurt like hell.

By the end of summer in 2010, I had hit a real low.  If you can compare my blogging career to one Ms. Britney Spears (Love you, girl!), this would have been when I shaved my head and started beating cars with umbrellas.  The amount of posts I published on my blog plummeted.  Followers stopped following.  I was exhausted from trying to please every single one of my readers and from helping them achieve their own blogging goals.

There have been countless times when I was thisclose to deleting my blog, but every time I'd hover over the "Delete Blog" button on the computer, I chickened out. When we moved to Germany, I thought I'd have oodles of new stories to tell.  I had the best of intentions of reviving my blog, but then…I don't know….life happened, I guess.  My blog got pushed aside.

I didn't forget about it completely, though.  I can't tell you how many times I'd say, "OMG!  I can't wait to blog about this!" But then I'd get home for the night and decide to do something else instead.

Long story short, I have decided to blog again, to make a concerted effort to write about the funny things that happen to me.  After winning Blog of Note, I censored my writing so that I wouldn't offend anyone.  I focused more on my readers than I did on my writing.  I realize now that I can't do that.  I'm not going to be able to please everyone.  I no longer want to.

So, I'm back.  I can't promise you I'll be back for good, nor can I promise you that I can get back to the way I was writing before and just after winning Blog of Note.  What I can promise you, though, is that I'm going to give it a try.

Here's to new beginnings.  




11 comments:

  1. Welcome back J! I love your blog and you! Don't censor, share your humor and adventures!

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  2. If you weren't so far away I would kiss you right now! Welcome back.

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  3. Glad to have you back! I always enjoyed your uncensored humor.

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  4. Well, I didn't know you were such a big shot, congrats on your Blog of Note. I know I'm a little late, but I don't think I knew that before. I just happened to find you one day when I was surfing, I mean working. Anyway, I love your blog. I love your writing, and I'm glad you have decided to start back up.

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I like comments filled with love and adoration best. Just saying.

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